New Baby and New Home

Hmm... where do I start? This has been an ongoing battle within my heart and I find it so hard to confess... I just feel guilty.

 

We moved into our new home soon after the birth of out little one. Like any lady, this is our first home and I was so excited. All year round as we waited for the home to be constructed I saved pictures and ideas for designing the interior of the house to make it home.

 

Well, a new little one changes a lot of things...It means waking up tired every morning, napping whenever you get a chance, doing one chore a day and being so proud of oneself, a good meal and a clean house is the biggest achievement... what about all the decorating plans and projects?

 

Well, that's just it... I wish I had time to customize and hang paintings, print favourite photographs and have them hung up, organize shelves more neatly, spring clean etc etc and sometimes I am frustrated that my house does not feel as much a personalized home as I would like...

 

But then I remember its my first year with my son....looking back I don't think these projects will mean as much to me but at the moment I feel at times like a failure if I cannot do both.

My hubby darling tries to help but I guess most days we both are overwhelmed...

 

Seasoned moms perhaps have suggestions for me...and yes I try my own little ways to keep up with both but many a day I just have to settle and leave things undone with a smile knowing tomorrow is always there.

 

Perhaps all this is just teaching me to Lean and Trust the Lord more, for he gives rest to the weary soul.

 

Dear Mister God, this is @ina... Lord, give rest to my anxious soul. May my failures make me lean into you more.

 

I Just Want To Be Where You Are

One of my favourite songs used to be I Just Want To Be Where You Are by Don Moen. I would sing this song with great devotion to the Lord.

 

Recently the song has come to have a whole new depth and meaning to it for me....You see, my little one really demonstrates what those words mean. He really, Just Wants To Be Where I Am. He is happy playing by himself and doing things as long as he can see me and knows I am near. If I were to walk away, he watches for a bit and then before I know it there will be big crocodile tears rolling down his cheeks and cries as though I was gone for ages!

 

Wow....if only I could walk with the Lord that way!

 

Dear Mister God, this is @ina...May this be the cry of my heart - I Just Want To Be Where You Are,

 

 

Special Flowers

Ah! Dad and Baby went out for a walk and came back with a bunch of beautiful, bright, yellow Dandelions for Mom! :D BIG Smiles.

Thank You Dad and Baby!

I had to pen this out because it was such a special feeling to have Flowers from Dad and BABY for the very first time! When I babysit I love to take kids for a walk and ask them to pick flowers to give Mum...never thought one day I would be in the receiving end! 

Dear Mister God, this is @ina... Thank you for the simple, beautiful memories we create each day and the joy you give us in everyday life. 

Road Trip!

We were planning a nine hour road trip for a few days. I really wanted to go but was very double minded - would baby travel well? would he be too tired? would the change be too much? would he handle meeting so many new people? will he stay healthy?

 

I battled the pros and cons in my head, talked it over with grandma and frankly got overly stressed. Finally we decided to go and the night before we left, I put him to sleep and was trying to finish packing his things. As I finally switched off the lights in his play room, the little toy car shouted "Road Trip! Brooom... Broom" LOL

 

It felt like God was smiling down at me and saying, "Relax, its going to be okay".

 

Well, it was! He had a wonderful time. He took the travel well and just loved being out in the camp site... looked at trees closely, loved the grass... it was his first time out since the weather was warmer.

and yes, everyone loved him -  his sprakly eyes, big toothless smile (for the last time), sitting up by himself he enjoyed playing and watching other kids.  His first two little teeth were making their way out and yet he did not let it dampen his spirit too much.

 

I realized I was needlessly worried and should relax a little more. Grandma is wise and keeps reminding me to try new things and give him space. Easier said than done! :)

 

Dear Mister God, this is @ina...Thank you that you watch over your little ones and calm us even in our needless fears.