An Ode to God

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . .

My spirit is awakened
My inner being alive
My strength is renewed
My doubts are dispelled

My soul sings out
My heart dances within
My mind is at rest
My thoughts full of hope

My life is turned around
My sins are washed away
My weakness is made beautiful
My pain is made a blessing

In the silence of loneliness
In the darkness of night
In the secret place of meeting
You touch and transform my life each day

How could this be?
I ask myself
How could this be?
But for you, my God.

A thought for the Day

Recently I received this SMS from a friend that read:

“When I walk alone, I wish to reach the end of the road. But when you walked with me I wish the road never ends.”

Unconsciously I smiled.

To me the ultimate expression of Love would be watching two old folks walking hand in hand in a park - He with his blurred vision and now shaky arms holding her while she radiating a beautiful glow that comes only from age & wisdom chats with him in a low voice.

Love I believe is companionship. It’s about those small insignificant moments of togetherness. It’s about the everyday things that bind people together. It’s about give and take. It’s about being there.

And like the quote says it can make all the difference between the way I walk this road of life.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . So glad you walk with me.

Essential piece

A few of my colleagues were given a small token of appreciation for their contribution to the organization. The gift was a key chain which had a piece of a jig-saw puzzle dangling from it. It was plated beautifully in a deep metallic blue with a gold trimming and had the words “Essential Piece” engraved on it.

I was reminded of the year end post I wrote.

I had compared a picture puzzle to my life and the zigzaw pieces to the many events in life.

Building along those lines, I realize now that the picture will not be complete but for every single piece - each piece is “The Essential Piece”.

Btw the dictionary definitions for the word Essential are – Vital, Indispensable, crucial, key.

Many a time I feel insignificant. Many a time pieces of my life seem insignificant. But the small token made me re-think. In a way no matter how insignificant I might feel or situations may be, they are essential bits that complete the picture of my life.

Just like in the story of Joseph where every piece was an essential piece which ultimately led to a life which still rings with greater meaning and purpose than he could have ever known.

Essential Piece – the words have just been ringing over and over again in my head all day long altering the way I look at the insignificant.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . I know you see me as the essential piece. Makes me re-think the way I live.

Cruising or Racing

On my way home I cross a long and high flyover. I was tired and my tummy was grumbling, it was late in the eve and I was racing home. When I reached the top of the flyover there was a driver before me who was doing just the opposite - Almost as though on a cruise slowly he moved looking around and enjoying the view!

“Stop! Sow down!” I heard a cry within me.

I slowed down too and tried to enjoy the sights and sounds around me as I drove. Not just while driving over the flyover but all the way home. Somehow it did help clear my head, calm my nerves and probably made me more agreeable when I got home.

I was reminded of a scene in Pixar’s movie CARS where Lightning McQueen, a hotshot rookie race car discovers the other side of life so to speak on a cruise with Sally the Porsche who opens up his mind to a world he did not notice simply because he was too wrapped up in himself and his career.

Hmmm…Been there!?

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . “Stop! Slow down!” Guess I could use a few of those signs boards along the road of life.

Something’s eating me!

Ever felt like that?

I just know it. And I can feel it. It’s inside me. It’s eating up a big chunk of my joy, my peace, my mind. I’m trying hard to put my finger on it but I can’t. It’s just illusive.

Well let me try to break it up.

I’ve been doing a lot of new things these last two weeks. Most of which I have never done before. New things unnerve me for starters and leave me a little wobbly on the inside. That could be part of it.

And then most of it makes me vulnerable to people. I have been doing it all with the best of intentions and to the best I know how but it has left me fearful of being judged and fearful of the possibility that I might be doing the wrong thing.

Then there is also this etc bit. The little this and that….I have not had the time to think over and it still lies within me waiting for my attention.

And though I hear that soft firm voice guide me I still find it hard at times. I know only one place where all of this can be put to rest. It’s talking to mister god.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . so here I am. Help me see with your eyes.

My Dreams

I’ve reached a point in life when reality has hit me head on and all my childish fancies look silly in my own eyes. I’ve stopped dreaming for awhile.

But one of the most common New Year wish I’ve got in the begining of this year is “May your dreams come true!”

Hmmm....It’s got me thinking about my dreams.

I’ve decided I’m going to begin this year dreaming. Dreaming Big. So here goes…

Author a Bestseller

Release an album that makes it to the Grammy’s

Live in a land with a different culture for a little while

Star gaze till I’ve found all the constellations visible to the naked eye

Support at least 12 children in their educational aspirations

Skate on ice

Be part of a youth magazine that touches and transform young lives around my country

Dance to the waltz

Adopt a child

Support a few missionary families

Make a dream come true for a person I know

Master the guitar

Own a grand Piano, and be a piano tutor

Support a social venture in my hometown

Take my mum and dad on a holiday to a foreign land

Learn sign language

Here my songs sung on a local FM channel

Work with abused kids

Own a column in a local newspaper

Surprise one person every week

Watch the aurora in the artic

Work in a public service department

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . nay… Dreaming! I know you are listening. : )

Pieces of the Puzzle

My brother bought me a 1000 piece puzzle for Christmas. It’s about 22X28 inches and a replica of a painting by Jeff Wilkie. The picture covers a sandy shore and a beautiful blue sea. There are mountains on one side and on the horizon the sun is setting or perhaps rising in an orange yellow haze. A sea gull flies over the ocean and a magnificent white horse stands on the shore with his dark brown mane flying in the air.

I’ve spread out the pieces on my table and it’s been slowly, very slowly coming together. This eve we put together the final pieces of the sky, and the rocks almost completing the horizon of the picture. When all of us go at it together we complete quite a bit and share a lot of laughs in the process.

I’ve been looking at the picture coming together with much joy and pride and also feel a sort of restlessness in wanting to put it all together as fast as I can so I can see for reality what it would look like.

As I sit here typing my year end post and I look at this year or the years that have gone by, it’s exactly like looking at my puzzle.

My creator must have used a lot of thought while painting my life’s picture with so many different colours and shapes and elements. And as I walk each day a piece of that picture comes together. Working on the bright skies of my puzzle was fun but the wild sea is tough and sometimes hopeless. And so also the circumstances in my life may differ. But as long as I keep working or walking patiently, one piece at a time or one day at a time, something beautiful is coming together. And those around me are integral in helping put this picture together.

Thank you for a beautiful Year.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . I don’t see the entire picture but I am happy where I am and I know You will not rest till You put all the pieces together! :)

Pocket Money!

It’s been quite awhile since I have received pocket money from my dad coz unfortunately I am too old for it now. : (

Still Dad surprised me by giving me some for no particular reason. This was special. I kept it in my purse for a while not knowing what exactly to do with it.

I’ve wanted this music book for awhile now. It did not cost much but somehow to buy it I felt I would be *splurging* on myself.

Now with this gift I decided I could buy it and finally got it for myself much to my delight. : )

No matter how much I earn I cannot compare it to the joy that little sum of money brought me. Weird isn’t it?

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . guess that’s why something *free* is always more precious than that which is *earned* … like your love.

Soul Massage

Friday Evening: Sadly I can’t say TGIF. I’ve got to get to work tomorrow. *sigh*. I really want a break.

Saturday Morning: I drag myself out of the house. What I think is going to take me the whole day I get done in two hours. I meet up with some friends for an hour of prayer. A dear friend of mine and I then decide to go out and do a little Christmas shopping and grab a bite to eat. I enjoy every moment together.

Saturday Afternoon: Have a fun time in a small get together with some friends and also got a neat gift. A little porcelain girl, wearing a pink dress and a straw hat, holding a yellow water pail having a smiling face engraved on it with a brown dog at her feet his nose turned up and looking into her face. : )

Saturday Night: I’m walking/running on the beach with my dog. The breeze on my face is so strong that it feels like I’m flying. I dig my toes into the loose sand on the shore. My dog and I play wildly for awhile till its time to go.

Saturday Night: I’m writing this post my heart refreshed, my mind relaxed and my soul massaged. A lot can change in a day!

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . You sure have your own simple way of surprising and restoring me! Thank you. : )

Wishes do come true!

I have made better acquaintances with a colleague of mine over this year. Last year round this time we had just exchanged a few formal mails. However round the end of the year on a rather informal note we had exchanged a rather unusual New Year wish that was such like:

Me:
Cheers! To many more smiles in the New Year!

Friend:
Wish u the same...Have a bright year ahead...!

Little did we know then that we would actually get to *know* each other any better. But due to some changes we ended up working together. I have discovered X to be a fun loving person, who I have indeed shared a lot of smiles with over this year! : )

Btw…Since December is the month of celebration, I’ve decided to actually think and wish from my heart coz you know what – wishes do come true!

Friend, I don't know if you would get to read this but I hope you would. Thank you. You sure have helped fill this year with smiles.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . You take even my little wishes quite seriously, don't ya?

Random Thoughts

A few thoughts based on recent circumstances . . .

Forgiveness is a lot easier when I know I’ve been there and I’ve done it too. And I almost always have.

Knowing what is it that I must not say helps in holding a good conversation.

The ultimate Truth: Only God is good. [Luke 18:18, 19]

Real Love overcomes self-pity.

When you trust you stop worrying.

Life in a shack can sometimes be cozier than a palace.

I can understand now, things I never understood before,
Some things only time can tell and experience can explain.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . Glad to be growing! : )

I will get through this

This week was hard. All I wanted to do was to quit doing what I do. I had very good reasons to do so too. Trust me. The biggest reason of all was - fear.

Anyway I was chatting with mom about it.

"Did you think you will ever get this far?" she said.

"Nope!" I said reluctantly knowing where she would be heading next.

"Well, that’s proof enough to know that you sure will get through this too!" she continued in her absolutely assuring voice.

I could *see* what she meant but I *felt* so differently and I could not quite connect what I could see mentally with the way I felt. But with time what she said slowly sank deep enough to reach my feeling and made me a whole lot better.

Moms seem to have a quick word to magically mend a problem that looms like a mountain at times. : ) Thank you Mom.

Dear Mister God, this is @ina talking . . . All that’s pulling me though is knowing that we have got this far and that’s proof enough to know we will get through this too!

The girl with a burnt face

I happened to see a young girl waiting to cross the road. Her face was so badly scarred from what seemed to be a fire accident. Her skin was almost completely damaged and her features marred beyond recognition.

I wondered what her story might be... I wondered what it would be like to be in her shoes...

Made me rethink my priorities. Made me rethink.

Dear @ina this is Mister God talking . . . You know her name and see much more than a girl with a burnt face. This is a silent plea for her and all around the world who can identify with her. But a stronger plea for me and those who can identify with me.

Time Capsule

Heard of this before? Well it's this pretty neat idea I came across from this a friend of mine! You can write yourself a mail and have it delivered to you after a time gap! It reads something like this:

"Greetings from your past. In the fall of 2005, you agreed to receive this message, which has been preserved for a year in ..."

"Here is the text of your message:" [Your text follows]

I have put extracts from what my friend had to say 'coz well it inspired me! Here goes...

"Hi X,

....This is "me", I mean "yourself" one year before! ...

I sincerely hope by this time, you must have.... [Hopes and dreams follow]

[I liked this bit the best]
This is to let ya know: don't loose that smile in your face and try your best to instill it on all the others you meet...."

Not all of my friend’s hopes and dreams had come true but the conclusion bit is a wonderful message… perhaps all that counts in the end of the day.

Inspired? You could try this out if you'd like....Send a mail to yourself after a given time frame or to anyone else for that matter! :)

Dear @ina this is Mister God talking . . . Greetings from the time of your creation. My thoughts and plans for you are like the grains of sand on the seashore… though the tides may sweep over them, they still remain. You mean so much to me. ;-)